The day’s news.

Former President Gerald Ford dies. (I really love the fact that the story is in English while the caption is in Spanish. Multiculturalism at work!)

“He came along when the country needed him the most,” said President Bush, who came along when the country needed him the least.

First James Brown, then this. It’s a publicity stunt. People are obviously dying in an attempt to get on one of those “year in review” shows. I give Ernest Borgnine two days.

Britney Spears voted “World’s Worst Dog Owner”.

Her activities as a pussy owner have also been called into question.

Polar Bears to be put on “threatened” list.

The White House announced that polar bears are threatened due to the global warming that the same administration has spent the past six years denying the existence of. At that rate, Bush MIGHT realize that Iraq is a clusterfuck by 2009.

More as the news happens, folks!

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9 Comments

  1. The Britany Spears item made me laugh! Besides, I bought some frozen broccoli spears for Christmas dinner, and every time I opened the freezer, I saw “Britany Spears” in there.

    The POlar Bear item made me cringe.

  2. Broccoli spears? I thought broccoli had “florets” and asparagus had spears.

    Anyway, I like how Britney is criticised for not carrying the dogs around everywhere she goes, but Paris is criticised for “treating them like accessories”. WTF? Make up your minds, you “Dog Fancy” reading morons!

  3. Archer made me feel guilty for not caring about Ford, so I clicked on a couple of articles. Turned out he was some hotshot athlete and NOT CLUMSY. Okay. You forgot the sex-kitten bacteria article.

  4. I guess I didn’t see that one.

  5. http://www.thewest.com.au/default.aspx?MenuID=27&ContentID=17177

    It’s that cat poop thing, which was a nice excuse when I was preggers to get others to clean out the litterbox. This is interesting:

    “Dr Boulter said the recent Czech Republic research was not conclusive, but was backed up by animal studies that found infection also changes the behaviour of mice.

    The mice were more likely to take risks that increased their chance of being eaten by cats, which would allow the parasite to continue its life cycle.”

    That’s like something out of Star Trek. Cool.

  6. Thanks for explaining. Interestingly enough, when I Googled “sex kitten bacteria” I found a blurb that Britney’s exposing herself was not intentional, because her undies were destroyed by a panty-eating bacteria. (Really, I doubt I could make up something THAT good!)

  7. It’s a publicity stunt. People are obviously dying in an attempt to get on one of those “year in review” shows.

    The noive of that Sadaam.

  8. they say people die in threes. let’s just keep crossing our fingers that the 3rd is Britney. 😉

  9. Sorry, Dawn, I’d have to put several others in line before her. Some guy in DC who’s initials are D.C., for instance.


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