Missing the Point

Paris Hilton Pleads Not Guilty to DWI.

I truly, TRULY do not get the need for this.

Not the charges. If she drove drunk, she deserves what she gets. But why would she be in this position in the first place?? Why?????

I mean, of course, the position of driving at all. If I had as much money as she does, or even half of it, there is no way anyone would ever see me behind the wheel of an automobile. Limos all the way. Every day, everywhere. That’s one of the perks, I should think, of being stinking filthy rich. The middle of the night? Wake the chauffeur up. It’s his job. Even if it isn’t, it shouldn’t be difficult for someone with her reputation – that is, as a stupid rich whore – to get someone to drive her wherever she wants.

And why would someone with her resources have to go out on a burger run? The main reason I eat burgers is the fact that filet mignon is not a frequent option for me. If I were a billionaire, McVomit’s is the last place I’d ever want to eat.

This is one reason why I didn’t have any sympathy for Mel Gibson. I cannot for the life of me imagine needing to drive myself to a bar if I was rich. For fuck’s sake, getting rid of the mundane tasks such as cooking, laundry, and driving is one of the main reasons to strive for wealth.

Improving your surroundings is another. That is why I have zero sympathy for these idiot rappers who continue in the gang lifestyle. Some famous hip-hopper gets shot dead in Compton? Fuck him. I hope he didn’t have kids, because those genes don’t deserve to be passed on. Compton is the last place someone with three platinum discs belongs. Why go through all the work it takes to become rich and famous just to stay in the frigging ghetto? So your old homies will say that you’ve forgotten where you came from. Fuck ’em, they’re poor, and where you came from sucked. Didn’t you notice? It deserves to be forgotten. If you’re too stupid to take your millions and get out of the gang lifestyle, then you probably deserve to get shot. Harsh, but true.

I’ve often heard it said that youth is wasted on the young. It’s becoming increasingly obvious to me that wealth is wasted on the rich.



  1. “wealth is wasted on the rich”

    Hell yeah! They should give it to us. I would NEVER drive, eat fast food, wait in a line, or clean the catbox. Well, I never do that now, but still.

  2. Wealthy disparity is definitely frustrating in the light of what many do with their piles. Many rappers seem to be the epitome of nouveau “filthy” rich, exercising the very worst aspects of capitalist excess. On the other hand, so-called refined aspects of wealthy society present scenarios just as ridiculous. I was watching Antiques Roadshow the other night and this guy had a napkin with a doodle and signature of Andy Warhol. Value – $30,000.

  3. And that’s WITHOUT the frame, folks!

  4. Paris Hilton out and about…..people being shot in Compton…hmmm
    I think i have a plan.

  5. Maybe they are just to stupid to think on it. A limo and chauffeur that is.

  6. Um, maybe they made such a bad decision about driving because they were DRUNK?

    I agree wealth is wasted on folks who don’t know what to do with ti.

  7. My point is, if I had their money, I’d be ina chauffered limo even while sober. THAT would be the norm at all times. The driving question wouldn’t even come up while I was drunk, because it wouldn’t be the norm for me.

  8. I never thought about it that way, but you’re absolutely right. In my area, we don’t even have taxicabs, so we’re pretty much screwed in that department. But celebs? Between taxis and chauffeurs, they’re fucking retarded if they drive drunk and deserve to be punished even more harshly than us “normal” people.

  9. That’s exactly what my husband said when Mel Gibson got in trouble. Like you said, even if you didn’t have the driver on hand that evening… who fucking hard would it be to find someone to drive you ANYWHERE??? Duh.

    Oh – and also? Wealth is also wasted on people with bad taste.

  10. And their little dogs, too, Miss Britt!

  11. I’ll second that.
    ‘cept for the cooking part.
    Cause I love to cook ;o)

  12. “Wake the chauffeur up. It’s his job.”

    [snooty] It’s the chauffeur’s job to be awake and ready to bring around my (most discreet) Rolls-Royce Silver Wraith whenever I’m in the mood to go out and about.

    I suspect that these (in)famous drunk drivers are more than stupid and self-centered. They prolly drive themselves ’cause, dammit! They paid a huge whoppin’ amount of money for their flashy new cars and they need to make sure everyone knows that. Not to mention how they’re immortal and everythin’.

  13. Sometimes, you just gotta get a Carl’s Jr.

  14. I got one of their delicious salads today. But then again, I couldn’t afford to fly to New Orleans and get one of Chef Paul’s.

  15. Ha! I got stuck in Manhattan traffic and started talking to the guy beside me. He said he didn’t want to deal with traffic, so he hired a driver. He didn’t look all that wealthy, but he knew what made life easier for him!

  16. I couldn’t afford to fly to New Orleans and get one of Chef Paul’s.

    Well it’s good to know you’ve got your priorities straight. Still, I like the “Joe as a rich guy” thinking…

    Baby you can fly my plane
    Cuz traffic’s driving me insane…

  17. And if I was rich Fed Ex would be getting a lot of business overnighting those Giordano’s pizzas down here! Hell, I’d just get Giordano’s to open a restaurant for me. HA!

  18. Why did the silly cow enter a not guilty plea? Just cos she can afford million-dollar lawyers who can argue her case till they’re, and everyone else, is blue in the face. Christ, just admit it, you stupid bint!

  19. O’Tim….you are SPOT ON. I’d just hire that Girdano guy to be my cook. Now I want one of those pizzas…..

  20. You are so fuckin’ right. Except for the driving. I love to drive. If I was stupid filthy rich I’d get me a super sports car and be dead within a week.

  21. I can’t fault THAT kind of honesty, Don.

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